Have you been feeling angry, sorrow and disappointment in every aspect of your life? Yes, you are- you’ve been feeling it for long time and why that is you’re feeling so! Have you before ever triedconvincing to yourself? I am saying so because even I was the one who was suffering from the similar pain before and couldn’t understand what to do next! I was unaware that it was within me that related to my joy which I tried to avoid. But life is too short they say- its write because it will follow us and make us go around it again and again till we don’t follow by it. People take years to understand this simple concept and maybe they have lost everything which used to give them joy – and this time is very important and crucial because once left it doesn’t come back and so did the same happened with me. I didn’t understand that apart from m job there was my love- my relationship, she was alone every time waiting for me and I was like a idiot only working thinking that only this would bring me happiness, but believe me I was totally wrong, I started working more to get more happiness but it never happened and I didn’t even get a percent of that. She waited and left ahead without me but I was stuck on the same place working- finding the happiness there- I don’t mean that don’t work, but I only mean is making your loved ones, your surroundings happy indirectly you get the joy and access to unlimited happiness, this was the biggest mistake of my life and which I regret it till now. People around you expect some attention and happiness from you- this world is standing upon love and so we are called humans because we humans are only surviving due to the love from our loved ones or else it would have even destroyed long time ago!
There was also a reason behind my story that I started developing boundaries for myself like being an extreme professional and didn’t allow anyone to enter it! Not even m love I allowed inside it and when I broke this boundary with my own hands- I saw no one standing for me outside the boundary, I was left all alone with me and myself- the sorrow within me which was trying to come out- I couldn’t handle because the mistake I committed was not a mistake but a crime which would be punishable if there existed any such law. There are several meanings of you developing a boundary for you:
1.Setting boundary indicates you’re selfish
Obviously! The people are called selfish because such people only communicate with others when they have work and at the remaining leisure time – not even go to look whether they exist or what they expect from them. This is really weird and so I was at the time when I had set up a boundary- I often got complaints from her that I am so mean and selfish but I ignored it thinking- is she gone mad? I am doing this for her! But later I realized that relationship doesn’t need any money or account balance but needs love and time to spend with each other, life meaning is simple- life is one and love till the extent you can, later you may not get another opportunity!
2.It indicates that you are saying no every time
People or your love will understand of saying no at some extent! But saying no every time- what will they think? They will surely find themselves in a position that you’re no longer interested in them and no longer love in your relationship. This is where you’re committing a crime where you’re saying no by building up the boundaries in between you and your relationship. Don’t you get a little time for people who love you- they don’t ask much time, but ask for time just to spend some time with them and communicate with them! If you start saying no time, than where should they go, with whom should they communicate with- is your boundary or the work in which you’re involved with is the only love you have? Then why did you come up in relationship? Ask all these questions to yourself- you’ll understand what goes on them!
3.Everyone will start hating you
These boundaries are the symbol to welcome hatred signals from others. They will surely feel you’re a selfish guy who only used them for your purpose- even this they won’t care but when you start setting up boundary between you and the person or in the relationship- no one will like you and they will be only filled with hatred in their hearts!